If you are reading this, you may be lost. This is probably not the blog you are looking for; I have been posting about once or twice a year for the past few years, so there is likely nothing of interest to find here. Even if there is, I will likely get tired of writing and you’ll be left wondering if I’m even still alive. So, yeah. Continue reading
This was my view during lunch this afternoon. It was pretty mild for only being 50 degrees outside, but the wind compensated for what little warmth the sun had to offer anyway, so I didn’t eat out there very long.
Still, it was nice to find a quiet space in the middle of this bustling hospital for once. Being on day shift has really made me yearn for the silence and solitude that night shift brings like never before. I’ve found myself wanting to revert back to old habits and draw back into my shell, instead of taking opportunities to socialize with my new coworkers quite a bit this week. One of the main reasons for this has been because I have started second-guessing my transition from the SICU to an outpatient unit.
With all of my fears starting to overshadow the good things that have come out of this change, I felt the need to tactfully talk it out with a few people today- a skill that I’ve had to master during my recovery from depression.
I’ve been reminding myself that life- and all of the curveballs it throws, is only what you make of it. Change is easy to talk about, but very difficult to implement. Once it has come, it can be very easy to only see the bad in situations and focus on the negative. But I can’t allow my fear of change (and in a sense, starting over) to keep me from succeeding in this endeavor. I’ve started down this new path, and I’m determined to see it through.
Today I’m choosing not to let negativity take away from appreciating the positive and beautiful things around me. Today I am choosing to be happy.
I put off sharing this because I look like a sweaty hot mess, but I am trying to hold myself accountable so bear with me! I started my C25K challenge Monday night after work and I must say, it felt pretty great! I can’t remember the last time I ran, due to some chronic knee and hip pain from the past decade. Adding that to my recent back injury (I was in an auto accident this past summer) made starting this endeavor seem like a terrifying prospect.
However, after being cleared from physical therapy, I promised myself that I would start running and I’m proud of myself for sticking to it! I am certainly not the best, not the quickest, not even the cutest- but I ran.
Tonight is my second run for the week. Fingers crossed!
Photo credit for the awesome graphic goes to @fempire_ on Instagram. Go check her out!
Anyone who has had the unique pleasure of working shift work for a sustained period of time, knows the value of a changeover day. Typically, this day counts as an actual 24 hour day, full of random sleep-filled intervals, semi-coherent thoughts or conversations with loved ones, and an unhealthy dose of grazing for food in the kitchen.
However, when your schedule involves getting off of work at 7am and starting the next shift at 8am the very next morning, all of those aforementioned terrible habits are taken to a whole new level.
Today, after getting home from work around 9am, I attempted to stay awake and fill my schedule with plenty of time-consuming activities: pet photos with Santa Claus downtown, catching up on some Netflix shows, going out on the town with my equally shift-work-laden husband, et cetera, et cetera. It was as ambitious as it sounds; only one of those things happened (spoiler alert: it was Netflix.) By noon, my mood had soured beyond redemption and my bed was the only cure.
As I lay here now, recently awoken by the sound of my sweet-but-protective hound dog, baying away at the sound of a passing motorcycle, I am readying myself to again tackle a short list of barely exhaustive activities. Hopefully folding a mountain of laundry, meal prepping for the week, filing the unruly stack of papers and miscellaneous items littered across my desk, studying a bit and hitting the gym tonight will all take up enough of my energy to ready me for bed again by midnight…
You can learn more about shift-work sleep disorder and the many horrors that accompany it by following these links:
Enjoy your evening, folks!
I’ve added a new gadget to the arsenal! New job + a new day-shift schedule= no excuses for neglecting to stay on track with my health and fitness goals. I’m also starting my first Couch to 5K (C25K) challenge after work on Monday. While I’m no stranger to fitness programs- I have started many and finished few, I am hoping to make it through and find myself healthier and happier by the end of it all.
Quitting my job on the SICU was the first step toward making my life work for me. Making myself healthier and creating my own happiness are the next. Wish me luck!
More info about the C25K challenge can be found at: http://facebook.com/C25Kfree.
Until next time,
Seriously people. Get over yourselves, all of you. I don’t care what side you are on because both major candidates are horrible human-beings. Your FB outrage will not change the election, but it does change my opinion of many people who I thought were functional adults.
Stop letting social media run your lives, take a deep breath of fresh air, physically go out and see your friends in REAL LIFE and live your darn lives already. Life is short and time is precious, so stop wasting it living out a literal representation of the 20th season of Southpark. I am only 26 years old; I should not have to be the voice of reason.
Shared from NPR:
“But the vast majority of emails — some of them nearing 1,000 words in length — read like testimonials to a therapist: I’m having a hard time focusing. I have questioned my friendships. I can’t stop scrolling. I’m exhausted. One email to NPR ended with: ‘It was good to get that off my chest.’ People are turning off TVs (one even canceled her cable — mass media are not off the hook, either), deleting social apps from their phones, rationing time spent on Facebook and Twitter, and shrinking their digital friend lists.”
Read more at: NPR.org.
P.S. Newly allotted free time in my life= dusting off my little blog that no one reads. Ye be warned.
If you haven’t already been moved by this video and the incredible message behind it, I implore you to follow the link below and learn more. I’ve been on a bit of a morbid “kick” lately, if you will, but these are things that must be talked about and not ignored the way that they are. Please check it out, share it, and don’t hesitate to start discussing your own end of life wishes with your loved ones.
Read more: http://zdoggmd.com/aint-the-way-to-die/